the addiction continues

so i have been on many dates this week, me, jennifer garner, and whatever i was eating at the time. it is phenomenal. but besides that, this has been the best thing for me. i find myself a lot less clam, well most of the time and a lot more focused. she is very good for me.

now this has been going on for a while, you know the affair that jennifer and i are having. whatever you do, please do not tell ben he might get a little jealous. hahaha

well anyways this is a good thing that i have found to help keep my mind off of life.

but other than that i have started to reconstruct my life from the ground up. this time it is all me and no one else. it feels good to do somethign for yourself all by yourself and know that you are the product of those actions and no one else. it is liberating.

friends are funny, i am finding that there are friends in the most unusual places and that there are those that i thought that i could trust, that i can no longer. some of them do not know it yet but most of them do. but for once in my life i have people there outside of my family that i can trust and know are there for me.

that is wonderful feeling. for once i am happy and it is nice.

this change is not because of a tv show but it makes me feel good.