Thursday, December 21, 2006

melt away

you come to me with a casual flow and suddenly, my defences start to go. when you talk to me in that sensual tone, it envelops me and i lose my self control. and baby, i just melt away, fall like rain. everytime i see your face, i go off. i just want to break it down, anytime you come around. maybe i could melt away in your arms.

imagining that your taking it slow, and so tenderly, till the feeling overflows. when you look at me I go soft and cave in, and i can't conceal that I'm slowly weakening. and baby, i just melt away, fall like rain. everytime i see your face, i go off. i just want to break it down, anytime you come around. maybe i could melt away in your arms.

you and me in a cloud of reverie, spin around inside my head unendingly. thoughts run wild as i sit and rhapsodize, pretty pictures of what i'd do if you were mine. and baby, i just melt away, fall like rain. everytime i see your face, i go off. i just want to break it down, anytime you come around. maybe i could melt away in your arms.

Friday, December 15, 2006

hello

i've been alone with you inside my mind. and in my dreams i've kissed your lips a thousand times. i sometimes see you pass outside my door. hello, is it me you're looking for? i can see it in your eyes. i can see it in your smile. you're all i've ever wanted, my arms are open wide. 'cause you know just what to say. and you know just what to do. and i want to tell you so much, i love you ...

i long to see the sunlight in your hair. and tell you time and time again how much i care. sometimes i feel my heart will overflow. hello, i've just got to let you know.
'cause i wonder where you are, and i wonder what you do. are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you? tell me how to win your heart, for i haven't got a clue. but let me start by saying, i love you ...

hello, is it me you're looking for? 'cause i wonder where you are, and i wonder what you do. are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you? tell me how to win your heart, for i haven't got a clue. but let me start by saying ...

I love you.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

back with a vengence

joanne albers has stuck again! in the past two days five people have died...wow that is kinda bad and i feel bad for everyone that this effects. now funny story only one of them affects the people who attend this school right now because a prefessor did just pass.

that was the worst one of all.

but honestly stuff like a graduate of 10+ years ago passing...how does that effect my life!?!?!?!?! i did not know him, and i am sure most of the people attending this school did not know him. mainly staff would have known him and i am pretty sure that their response would be like, oh that is sad my condolences to the family...and that is about it.

other than reminding us about constant death around us what is she good for?? well that is if she really exists.

oh yea did i mention that i might have gotten a job...we will discuss this more if i find that it is set in stone, but until then keep your fingers crossed.

Friday, November 24, 2006

thanks-taking

this is the time of year when we should all give thanks for everything around us. our fredom, the sun, the sky, air to breathe, food to eat, friedns, families and great loves...well i think it is time for thanks-taking.

you know i think it is that time of year where everyone should be thanking you for all of the stuff you had to put up with from them. how you are an amazing child, sibling, parent, grandparent or other relative, friend, foe (those are fun too) or love...

people should be gratefl to bask in your glory, that you bestow your grace upon them. only then will thanksgiving (thanks0taking in some people's cases) be what it is supposed to be.

by the way the people like me who are thanks-taking you know who you are and you are freaking MAGNIFESCENT!!!!

Friday, November 17, 2006

that thing...

guys you know you better WATCH OUT, some girls, some girls are only about that thing, that thing, that thi-i-i-ing, that thing, that thing, that thi-i-i-ing.

girls you know you better WATCH OUT, some guys, some guys are only about that thing, that thing, that thi-i-i-ing, that thing, that thing, that thi-i-i-ing.

the story of my life right now? hmmm let me think about that for a minute...NOPE. no one i know is about that thing right now. but oh well what can you do?

yea i know kinda boring today

Thursday, November 16, 2006

my new glasses





so how do you like them? i think that they are great? and they are green, who else has green glasses? no one...ok in the world i am sure that there is at least ONE other person with them but i do not know that so in my life i am the only one with green glasses.

here are some pics for all you fans that have not seen them yet and for those who have seen them and cannot get enough of them...do they look good i still do not know if i think i like them on me, but i do like the way they look period.

who the !@#@ is joanne albers

ok so i swear that this woman does not exist. come on man can this woman only do one thing, send out death notices?

she is like the valpo grim reaper...honestly i could not think of a more morbid job. that is why i think that she is a bot programmed to just send these emails out so some person does not have too. it seems like every time i get something from this b_ _ _ h it is about someone related to a professor, or faculty worker or something like that has died. i can understand telling us if one of our professors parents or children pass, but outside of that, and i do not mean to sound like i do not care or have no compassion or anything, why the h-e-double hockey sticks do we the students care?!!?!?

i can understand that death is a big thing but i would not like to have my business put out over the campus-wide list-serve every time someone in my family passed, and plus i really do not think most people would give a hoot anyways.

i guess this is my rant about something stupid but honestly joanne do you not have anything else better to do with your life than tell every single student about everyone who has died because less than 25% of the student body at any given time knows who you are talking about. get a hobby or something...sheesh!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

saying good-bye

sooner or later i will have ot say good-bye, you know to all of hte wonderful things that i have been surrounded with these past few years and i must say i will miss them all...

good-bye...
noises that wake my up at 6 in the a.m. and keep me from going to bed
nasty smell of ginkgo biloba fruits rotting on the ground
unattractive women
VU police dept
year round construction
nasty cafeteria food that costs entirely too much
funky smells that come from the sewers
all of those emails about every one's way to distant relatives deaths that no one other than the family cares about from joanne albers who i really do not think exists
erratic weather
unattractive women (sorry but this is valpo we are talkin about)
physical plant and all of their shortcomings
no places to park
cisco clean access
did i mention unattractive women
8 am classes
fire drills at 10pm
water shortages
constant construction
ugly landscaping
oh did i forgot to mention unattractive women?
constant construction
and a DRY CAMPUS

i will miss you all...

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

shiny new T-O-Y

you know that feeling you get when you get a shiny new toy, yup that is me right now...except my toy is extra special, it can KILL you. muahahahahahahahah (by the way that is my evil laugh, just in case you did not know).

well all it is, is a new set of knives for culinary school. i am so excited.

oh did i tell you how i was gonna take over the world? lemme tell you...

first i am gonna go to culinary school, and learn how to cook really well. and then i am gonna fatten everyone up til they cannot think straight. remember that phobia list i posted? yup i am gonna use that to scare everyone into submission, especially the one about the great mole rat?!?! what the h-e-double hockey sticks is that?!?!?!?!

actually the way i am gonna take over the world is marry oprah. then i can just buy the world.

anyways sports fans that is about all i got for you tonight.

oh by the way do not drink rat poison, it is bad for you. that skull and cross-bones is a dead give-away.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

and i am back

so i thought that i have had nothing to write about for the longest time ever...what the h-e-double hockey stick was i thinking?!!

seriously i have been to 2 weddings and a funeral this year, i am graduating, moving to san francisco, got a tattoo, going to culinary school, got into a really bad car accident (i am ok luckily) and my mom moved to bloomington, oh and one more thing i got a really serious muscle disease that is gone now.

so so so much. but you know what through all of this stuff the one thing that i can say that has happened to me is that i have grown

for instance...i still make fun of people, but i have gotten better at the english language so i do it and they smile back at me, i have found a way to do my homework and get a good grade but it is crap, i am bs my way through class and yet still do well on the tests, this is done without lying or cheating mind you, and for the most part i am becoming more cynical...

ahhh maturation at its finest, what would i do without those wonderful life lessons that serve to embitter us and make into the wonderful, caring human beings that we are today...how i love thee

but for the rest of my life i have learned many things about people and myself...
1. even though you are in college, there are still a lot of dummies
2. everytime you think someone can be no more juvenile they surprise with something worse
3. people act like they are permanently stuck in high school (grow up)
4. i still love to sing
5. my knees are gettin old
6. that no matter how hard you try that little pouch in front of your stomach will never go away so give up and spend your time doing something more productive.
7. narcissism/self-interest governs peoples lives...that is not what should be doing it folks you focus is on the wrong thing
8. no matter how many things you do to your body and face the same ugly person is underneath
9. beauty is over-rated
10. my tattoo still does not have a cool story attached to it one of these days i will think of one

i am sure someone has found this not funny or offensive, h-e-double hockey stick, i am sorry, but i think it is comical so oh well

Sunday, July 09, 2006

nonsensical

while at the bar i ran into all sorts of people. you know the usual drunks, the dd's, the girls that hit on you, the ones you wish wouldn't...you know the whole gammit.

well something odd happened this time that i never expected...

i ran into a whole bunch of people that i had not seen in over 5 years all grown up. you figure that none of them would remember who i am right, FALSE they all remembered me and it was freaky. granted some of them i am friends with on facebook but still it was weird. everyone from my high school class decided to go out and to the same bar that i was at.

what a ko-ink-y-dink

oh guess what, i forgot i guess i will have to fill you in lata.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

hmmmm...

so i have been thinking about a lot of things recently...
what am i doing with my time
what am i doing with my life
am i happy with the choices that i have been making
am i happy now
more than just that...but all of the answers will come to me when i am ready to answer them. as of right now i make all decisions that i think will benefit me the best in the future.

ok now seriously off of the serious stuff. WHAT is going on at my job i have worked for the same company for the past three summers and this is by far the craziest job i have ever seen. all i do is put stamps on post cards. yes there is a machine that does it but someone has to run it and that someone is me...

it is the most mind-numbing thing i have ever done in my life EVER. i would rather have someone tattoo my whole body. seriously though that will never happen.

but i am thinking of getting a couple more one to go around the waist and one on my back but they will be in the ink that you can only see in black light which makes them even more cool. and they will be in the same style as the one on me foot.

oh i forgot to mention that i work at 2:45 to 11:00 in the PM how s!@#@y is that?!

anyways other than that life is pretty good, there might be a new addition to my love life going from 1 to 2 i will keep you posted.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

ha ha ha i am laughing

so i have been reading some of my old blogs and they made me laugh... i love they way i used to think and in some cases still do.

i laugh at...
me falling
silly irony
bad outfits
ebaum's world
homestar runner
strongbad
things falling on people, as long as they are ok
other people falling, as long as they are ok
silly movies
tasteful jokes
sometimes some that are not and then i feel bad
honesty because at the end of the day it is really funny
things in the past, they are always funny

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

it's party time





being 21 it is time to party!!! so throughout this year i have done just that. a little here a little there nothing big you know except for a couple. but that is not the important thing, what is important is the memories that were made those nights.

like the time that the police came and busted to party, the time when someone came in looking like they took a swin in some garbage, the party no one wore clothes (but we were covered) and stuff like that. here are some pics that might show you what i mean...

Sunday, April 02, 2006

how long it has been

well i must say that it certainly has been a very long time since i have written something here so i thought that i should start again.

well there have been many things that have happened. one is that i have had a tattoo for a very long time, now i know this might not be big news but i am thinking about getting another one on my back.

i was diagnosed with a muscle disease that has now gone away, thank goodness. and i got into a car accident.

ok enough with all of the bad stuff, it wears me out. so you know what i learned, everything in life is so much fun it is all in how you look at it. granted things like death really are not fun but it is about celebrating the life. i guess i kinda thought about it when i thought i was gonna die and now i have realized that celebration is just that great so everything in life is wonderful, even if it does not feel like it right away.

nothing really comical or interesting today, perhaps tomorrow.

Friday, December 02, 2005

out

now this is the part where we break it down, now pick it up.

just a little taste of what i hear when i am at the club. it is a blast everytime i go. me and the group go about 2 times a month and just cut up. ahh the college life how i love thee, to bad it ends in 6 months.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

sleepy

today i slept...

more than usual, i do not ever remember doing anything like this before. why i ask myself. is it because i have this new job? is it because i am doing more school work? am i stressed? hmm this answer to this i do not know.

but what i do know is i am sleepy...

Thursday, September 22, 2005

my eternal anger

i have decided that i am angry for many reasons that cannot be disclosed. i have decided that i cannot take this and unless my issues are redressed i will be havnig some strong words with a lot of people.

that is all i have to say.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

is this me?

i just took a personality test...is this me?

Portrait of an INFJ - Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging
(Introverted Intuition with Extraverted Feeling)


The Protector

As an INFJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you take things in primarily via intuition. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit with your personal value system.

INFJs are gentle, caring, complex and highly intuitive individuals. Artistic and creative, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities. Only one percent of the population has an INFJ Personality Type, making it the most rare of all the types.

INFJs place great importance on havings things orderly and systematic in their outer world. They put a lot of energy into identifying the best system for getting things done, and constantly define and re-define the priorities in their lives. On the other hand, INFJs operate within themselves on an intuitive basis which is entirely spontaneous. They know things intuitively, without being able to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the subject at hand. They are usually right, and they usually know it. Consequently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions. This is something of a conflict between the inner and outer worlds, and may result in the INFJ not being as organized as other Judging types tend to be. Or we may see some signs of disarray in an otherwise orderly tendency, such as a consistently messy desk.

INFJs have uncanny insight into people and situations. They get "feelings" about things and intuitively understand them. As an extreme example, some INFJs report experiences of a psychic nature, such as getting strong feelings about there being a problem with a loved one, and discovering later that they were in a car accident. This is the sort of thing that other types may scorn and scoff at, and the INFJ themself does not really understand their intuition at a level which can be verbalized. Consequently, most INFJs are protective of their inner selves, sharing only what they choose to share when they choose to share it. They are deep, complex individuals, who are quite private and typically difficult to understand. INFJs hold back part of themselves, and can be secretive.

But the INFJ is as genuinely warm as they are complex. INFJs hold a special place in the heart of people who they are close to, who are able to see their special gifts and depth of caring. INFJs are concerned for people's feelings, and try to be gentle to avoid hurting anyone. They are very sensitive to conflict, and cannot tolerate it very well. Situations which are charged with conflict may drive the normally peaceful INFJ into a state of agitation or charged anger. They may tend to internalize conflict into their bodies, and experience health problems when under a lot of stress.

Because the INFJ has such strong intuitive capabilities, they trust their own instincts above all else. This may result in an INFJ stubborness and tendency to ignore other people's opinions. They believe that they're right. On the other hand, INFJ is a perfectionist who doubts that they are living up to their full potential. INFJs are rarely at complete peace with themselves - there's always something else they should be doing to improve themselves and the world around them. They believe in constant growth, and don't often take time to revel in their accomplishments. They have strong value systems, and need to live their lives in accordance with what they feel is right. In deference to the Feeling aspect of their personalities, INFJs are in some ways gentle and easy going. Conversely, they have very high expectations of themselves, and frequently of their families. They don't believe in compromising their ideals.

INFJ is a natural nurturer; patient, devoted and protective. They make loving parents and usually have strong bonds with their offspring. They have high expectations of their children, and push them to be the best that they can be. This can sometimes manifest itself in the INFJ being hard-nosed and stubborn. But generally, children of an INFJ get devoted and sincere parental guidance, combined with deep caring.

In the workplace, the INFJ usually shows up in areas where they can be creative and somewhat independent. They have a natural affinity for art, and many excel in the sciences, where they make use of their intuition. INFJs can also be found in service-oriented professions. They are not good at dealing with minutia or very detailed tasks. The INFJ will either avoid such things, or else go to the other extreme and become enveloped in the details to the extent that they can no longer see the big picture. An INFJ who has gone the route of becoming meticulous about details may be highly critical of other individuals who are not.

The INFJ individual is gifted in ways that other types are not. Life is not necessarily easy for the INFJ, but they are capable of great depth of feeling and personal achievement.

Jungian functional preference ordering:

Dominant: Introverted Intuition
Auxilliary: Extraverted Feeling
Tertiary: Introverted Thinking
Inferior: Extraverted Sensing

Sunday, September 04, 2005

alaska 2




for all of you that think that my photo skills are unmatched, here are some more for you to drool over...